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Libb

@ Libb @piefed.social

Posts
12
Comments
1079
Joined
9 mo. ago

A 50-something French dude that's old enough to think blogs are still cool, if not cooler than ever. I also like to write and to sketch.

  • I don’t care anymore

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  • I’m not much into poly-amorous (nearing my 60s, I've been sharing my life with my spouse for almost 30 years now and if neither of us are saints we’ve also never felt any need to ‘enrich’ our couple with more participants) but if this is how you feel maybe that is not for you? I mean that specific partner(s), or the poly-amorous thing in general?

    I obviously don’t know what's the issue, how could I, but what I can tell you without any doubt that if you feel like shit, which it seems you do, it’s a safe warning sign that there is an issue. And that is up to you to see what’s causing that. And to decide how to correct it.

    No matter how you decide to work on it, alone or with your partner(s) you better have a clear understanding of what the issue is beforehand and be ready to face not real... not pleasant things.

    Allow me to insist one last time: I' don't know poly-amorous but I do know that no relationship, no matter its form, should make anyone involved belittled or a mere 'extra'. I don't even need to know you personally to be sure of that :)

  • NetNewsWire

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  • One of those few nifty indie apps I liked so much when I was using a Mac, even before it was open sourced when it was still paid for. No Linux version (and I have no plan to move back to Apple) but I remember it fondly <3

  • Is it bad to have a male best friend when you’re in a relationship?

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  • My boyfriend doesn’t care about it, but he still says that my best friend is just “waiting for his turn with me.”

    'Wrong' or 'not wrong' that is 'moral' and I don't think moral means much in a couple (edit: moral is a church thing, or maybe a tribunal one). Moral also puts you at risk of seeing yourself in the eyes of your partner (or them seeing themselves in your eyes) as 'the bad guy', or worse, which certainly will not help solve any doubt or issue you might have. Last, moral can prevent you you from asking yourself the right (and somewhat very simple) question that can help you feel better regarding that 'issue': is it something you're fine with? You both, I mean. To make it clear:

    1. Would you/Do you care if your boyfriend has a girl best friend with whom he likes to spend as much time as possible, and share everything, even the most personal?
    2. If that girl best friend existed, would you think she too is waiting for her turn to be with him?

    Honestly answering those two questions can help you have a better understanding of what your partner may feel.

    Since you wanted to know our personal opinions on the question of (other gender) friendship, here are my 2 cents... in two points:

    • My spouse and I are certainly not teenagers anymore as we're both nearing our 60s. We have also been together for close to 30 years and counting. We still meet people of various genders and we both have friends the other is not that happy with. without any issue.Because we also quickly realized being in a couple should not mean doing everything together, spending all our time together, having the same ideas, desires, and so on. Contrary to what Plato told us, we're not one my spouse and I. We're two different persons that enjoy being together while having many opposing views and tastes. It's just that we value our relationship enough to always be more willing to make things work between us even when it's not easy, than to just part ways each time we don't agree on something ;)
    • Sincere friendship is rare and precious. It is at least as rare and precious as sincere love. And it certainly is a lot more important than sex, even when it's great.

  • In the instances that eliminated down votes, how did it change your posts and comments?

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  • I don't care about votes myself, but:

    1. I think people should be allowed to vote, up or down, freely, if that is what they want to do.
    2. People should also be allowed to not have to see votes or be bothered with it (my own choice).
    3. In summary: I think it's at the individual level, not at the instance level such decisions should be made. The only task of the instance being to provide the tools for the users to apply said decision as simply as possible, and to protect those users from any abuse of the system.

  • What is your opinion on websites blocking visitors from specific countries (geoblocking) for personal or political reasons?

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  • Double post, wtf?

  • Piefed's Anonymous Voting situation.

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  • Once again, thank you very much. I just did that it's working nice :)

    For anyone curious, here is what it looks like now:

  • Have you ever thought about deleting your account?

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  • because people analyzing my behavior and accusing me of things has started to get to me.

    Why bother?

    I’m wondering if you’ve ever felt something similar.

    Most certainly: as an old dude that has been online since the mid-80s, I've had more than a few opportunities. 1) I learned to not care about perfect stranger's opinion about my person. 2) I also learned to not 'play' with strangers (not saying you are, how would I known, but if you do that may not be the smartest thing to do if you're interested in having interesting exchanges and discussions).

    But I think I might delete my account and everything,

    That's the nice thing about freedom: if that's what you want to do, by all means do it. Just, maybe, take a moment to decide beforehand if that's really what you want to do or if it's just some emotional reaction angry to something that happened. In the later case it may not be worth deleting your account ;)

  • Piefed's Anonymous Voting situation.

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  • Thx a lot. I had never noticed this feature.

    I will not remove all up/downvote a I think it's worth being able to upvote useful/enriching comment (like yours) but know I have an option to consider and explore: could I remove just the displayed total of upvotes/downvotes (that part I really don't care about) and maybe the 'Attitude' stats displayed under my profile. Thx again :)

  • Piefed's Anonymous Voting situation.

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  • Thx, I will look at that :)

    is this something to add (somewhere) in the browser or to use in an extension like uBO?

  • Boris Vian - La Java des bombes atomiques

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  • Je me souviens, début des années 80 j'écoutais ses chansons en boucle (et d'autres, dans le même esprit) et je me disais que moi aussi je deviendrais auteur de chansons. Quelques années plus tard, je ne suis pas devenu auteur de chansons (j'ai trouvé autre chose à faire) mais je reste un très grand amateur des textes de Vian.

    Merci ;)

  • What are some hugely important music albums?

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  • Album doesn't mean much to me I'm afraid. I mean an opera (which literally means 'a work') could be considered an album? What about a symphony (which could means 'a body of (harmonious) sounds')? And what about all tho the other types of music?

    They were not released as 'albums' (no disc players, back then) but they were released as a coherent ensemble one was expected to listen to as a whole, in a certain order. And they were released as printed editions too as, back then, owning music sheets was the equivalent of what purchasing albums is/was to us: people would buy them in order to be able to read the score and to play it by themselves or with friends ;)

  • [Lundi lecture] 📖 Qu'avez-vous lu cette semaine ?

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  • Daniel Halévy "Essai sur l'accélération de l'histoire".

    C'est la réédition de 2026 de ce court mais fascinant texte de 1948. 160 pages, aux Belles Lettres.

    Dans sa préface à la seconde édition (1961) l'auteur se défend d'avoir voulu faire ça mais c'est presque impossible de ne pas se dire qu'il a tenté aussi de faire une esquisse des grands évènements dans l'histoire de l’humanité du point de vue Occidental… Mon avis, c’est qu’il y a plutôt bien réussi mais pas sans potentiellement susciter des polémiques.

    C’est inévitable, surtout qu’il ne cache ni préférences ni dédains, et ça serait d’autant moins évitable aujourd'hui où le simple fait d'oser dire qu'on aime pas une chose ou une personne, ou même le choix d'utiliser une grammaire plutôt qu'une autre, fait de vous un ennemi à lyncher publiquement. Mais ça Halévy n'y peut rien. C'est notre problème à nous et c’est hélas un des traits spécifiques qui restera de notre époque, ça et notre joyeux sabordage de toute idée de démocratie et de citoyenneté souveraines sur l’autel de nos nouveaux Dieux (technologie et profit, loué soient leurs noms). Un des traits de notre époque, donc, qui ne laissera pas de nous l'image la plus flatteuse qui soit : notre enthousiasme à vouloir effacer de la surface du monde toute personne qui ne partage pas notre vision du monde et nos valeurs. Bref, ça c’est pas Halévy le problème, c’est nous. Mais ça risque d’impacter la façon dont on le lit.

    C'est une lecture stimulante. Et pas seulement pour les passionnés d'histoire. Au contraire, j'aurais même tendance à penser qu'il faudrait le mettre entre les mains de lecteurs qui n'ont pas tellement d’intérêt pour l’histoire car, à sa manière, Halévy pourrait bien réussir à stimuler leur curiosité (ou alors un tel agacement face à ses affirmations tranchées… et tranchantes) et donc leur donner le désir d'en savoir plus sur telle ou telle période/changement/évènement. Surtout, encore une fois, que c’est un texte très court.

    Hésitez pas à demander à votre bibliothèque publique, s’ils ne l’ont pas déjà, s’ils ne peuvent pas l’acheter comme ça il sera dispo pour plus de monde ;)

  • I hate how pedantic people online will get all over that my grammar isn't great.

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  • 100%

  • I hate how pedantic people online will get all over that my grammar isn't great.

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  • Thx, edited. And, nope, I don't block for that kind of interactions, quite the contrary ;)

  • What are some hugely important music albums?

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  • Any specific era? I mean, I'm mostly into classical music and I would consider quite a few of those old pieces... hugely important, to say the least: much more meaningful than many of the more recent productions. But, even though I've a much more limited understanding of it, I also consider some more recent and even a few contemporary artists... hugely important ;)

  • I hate how pedantic people online will get all over that my grammar isn't great.

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  • As long as it is readable, it shouldn’t matter if it not 100% perfect.

    +1 to your two clauses.

    I will confess, I’m not that great at grammar.

    Neither am I. Even less so when I post in English (which I mostly do) instead of my native French. Not that I'm that better with French :p

    Otherwise, I just felt kinda bullied and mocked for having bad grammar skills

    The thing is that you should focus on the things and people that matter to you. And ignore the others.

    There are 8 billion people on the planet. Of those, I know a few dozens personally. And of those few dozens only a handful of them I care about what they think about me. The 8 billions remaining? Well, I wish them the very best but I will not act differently in the hope of maybe please them. No hard feelings ;)

    The only difference is that I would just block them which I know is little petty

    I don't think it is.

    The blocking feature is one I very regularly use and would probably use Piefed a lot less if it was not for it. I'm not spending my time here to read shit/Low effort content and certainly not to be bothered by people whose obvious desire would to trigger some emotional reaction on my part.

    So, when I spot such a person, I block them. End of the drama. A bit like I decide who I let in at my own place, I filter out who I do not want to be forced to read. Exactly like I filter my home feed to 'Subscribed' only and I subscribe only to selected communities whose content I know very seldom produce turd content ;)

    My patience is thin and I just get sick of having people in my life just getting angry at me as well as I feel like a punchline to a joke.

    You can't win if you want the world/people to change and act/be like you want them to. What you can learn to do instead is to ignore the things and persons you can't act upon and focus on what you can act upon.

  • Piefed's Anonymous Voting situation.

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  • BTW I completely hide vote counts on posts, I use the voyager frontend for this

    I only browse on my PC using the browser and I can't find any option to hide those. I barely use my phone to be honest and refuse to use any social platform on it (privacy concerns).

  • What made you choose your Fediverse Instance?

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  • It's easy to give it a try and decide if it's worth changing (I've done it and even though it's great to be able to do that, it's far from being complete and painless (one may not like losing all their previous posts/comments when changing instance).

    I just checked I switched from Lemmy 9 months ago and and I've yet to find a reason to go see elsewhere. There things I don't like as much as others but they're easy to ignore ;)

  • Piefed's Anonymous Voting situation.

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  • Oh, thx for the clarification (and feel free to ignore my own noise, then).

    Never heard of that. What is it used for?

  • Forum Libre @jlai.lu
    Libb @piefed.social

  • Forum Libre @jlai.lu
    Libb @piefed.social

    À Roubaix, cette école remet des élèves en difficulté sur pied

  • Forum Libre @jlai.lu
    Libb @piefed.social

    Puis-je devenir Canadien, siouplé?

    thefoolwithapen.com /posts/2026/0121-15h09/
  • Casual Conversation @piefed.social
    Libb @piefed.social

    Back to textbooks: Denmark rolls back digital learning • FRANCE 24 English

  • Forum Libre @jlai.lu
    Libb @piefed.social

    1975: le vieux Paris qui disparaît

  • Ask Lemmy @lemmy.world
    Libb @piefed.social

    In a place without access to US apps and online services, how would you use the Internet?

  • Forum Libre @jlai.lu
    Libb @piefed.social

    Joyeux...

  • Forum Libre @jlai.lu
    Libb @piefed.social

    Une question (peut-être pas complètement) con à propos de postes de radios Internet et/ou Dab

  • Privacy @programming.dev
    Libb @piefed.social

    An audit for AI?

  • Forum Libre @jlai.lu
    Libb @piefed.social

    Umberto Eco : "le monde vit pour aboutir à une émission de télé" | INA Culture

  • Books @lemmy.ml
    Libb @piefed.social

    Book sharing or maybe just a silly idea? Also, I'm not sure where this belongs, if this belongs anywhere

    social.vivaldi.net /@Lbb89/115644609170370202
  • Journaling Just Works @sh.itjust.works
    Libb @piefed.social

    A new privacy-respecting journaling app?