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FnordPrefect [comrade/them, he/him]
FnordPrefect [comrade/them, he/him] @ FnordPrefect @hexbear.net
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Joined
5 yr. ago

I'm Curious.

  • "In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made many people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move."

    • Treatle mindset, wont watch Andor because it wont do fanservice.

  • Whenever Darth Vader isn't onscreen actively committing atrocities, all of the other characters should be asking, "Where's Darthie?"

    • Elon Musk is running out of ideas to save Tesla

  • It's fun to intentionally misread this headline so instead of "Elon Musk is running out of ideas with which to save Tesla" it's "Elon Musk is going to save Tesla by running out of terrible ideas to impose on the company"

    • 'Cowardice and Abdication': Democrats Grant Unanimous Consent to Adjourn Senate for 3-Day Weekend

  • "Look, we aren't going to do anything anyway, so why shouldn't we be comfy while we (don't) do it?
    "

    • When the propaganda isn't working anymore

  • It's like a perfectly mockable statement. I'll go with:

    Liberalism sent them an assload of resources a few decades ago when they could cynically exploit their people and now it's blowing back in completely predictable ways?

    • Poor NATO forced to expand :(

  • "My kid's school is an enemy of the state! Do you know what they were serving for lunch? CRINKle cut French fries! Suffice to say, I threatened legal action against every member of the staff until they agreed to rename them 'Bipartisan, reaching-across-the-aisle-cut Freedom fries!'"

    • Caption this.

  • "Calm down! That's his leg..."

    • EPA grants preliminary approval to use radioactive material in Florida road pilot project

  • "Irradiate the Roads? You don't actually believe this do you?"

    "Eh, gotta irradiate something!"

    • i used to have trouble staying focused, but then i saw this sign and i was cured

  • I can't be the only one who sees this as: "Don't listen to this nerd! Also, don't you want to check your phone?"

    • Capitalist media be like

  • "And, obviously, price is the SOLE mechanism we have to limit purchases. I mean, sure, we could simply not allow one dude to back up a dumptruck to push 10,000 rolls of toilet paper into-"

    crowd interrupts with cheers*

    "But-BUT that would be Un-American and communist! And my father died fighting those commies!

    "So that will be $65 a roll if you want to wipe your ass"

    • Airborne Plastic Chemical Levels Shock Researchers

  • Plasticizers are chemical compounds that make materials more flexible. “No matter who you are, or where you are, your daily level of exposure to these plasticizer chemicals is high and persistent,” Volz said. “They are ubiquitous.”

    Well, at least all the microplastics invading my brain are staying nice and flexible...

    • Those were the people building communism

  • "It's a good thing I don't know what a cm is, or I'd feel violently insecure right now!"

    • "REM sleep is the next AI"

  • "Doctor, you have to help me! I keep having this dream where I'm a car, but I'm always just stuck in traffic!"

    'Ah yes, the meaning here is quite clear...'

    "Is it because of my subconscious dissatisfaction with the meaningless, repetitive grind that my life has become in this techno-hell dystopia?"

    'No no no, nothing like that. It just means you need to pony up the $15.99 monthly to upgrade your REM Ember's subscription out of Serf Tier.'

    • Who wants to explain to comrade Xi what Dialectical Materialsm is 🤣

  • Marxism

    Mar xism

    Mar Xi sm

    Gasp, they're right!

    • ISS astronauts on eight-day mission may be stuck until 2025, Nasa says

  • Gilligan's ISSland

    • Boeing says its space mission is 'going well' despite its Starliner leaving 2 astronauts stuck on the ISS

  • "That's right! It's going well..."

    "Sure it is. It's just the coming back that's causing trouble!"

    • Soulist

    Hexbear is right wing because Uyghurs and Russia and not voting for Trump is voting for Trump

  • Hey, I don't know...have you seen Biden lately? If there is anyone to lead the process of passing beyond the bounds of consensus material reality it's him

    • Dead Florida dolphin was infected with highly pathogenic bird flu

  • Would it be a reasonable guess that this could be caused by untreated farm runoff from infected cows' poo?

    • "We are the West’s last generation before the new Dark Age begins"

  • Totalitarian indoctrination is making young people hate the west

    Yeah, all those riot cops beating and arresting people for expressing their free speech to denounce genocide are really planting those anti-west ideas deep. Wait, what do you mean that's not what you meant?

    Seriously, this guy's thinking is so backward it's like he's trying to kill a robot or something

    • Tesla is dragging Apple into its upcoming fatal Autopilot crash trial

  • "What? It is self-driving! It drives itself straight into walls!"